Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Do you care what people think of you???

Do you care about your image?

I have days where I tell myself I don't care what others think and I'm gonna do what I wanna do and to hell with everyone else.

But that is really not me. I honestly do care what others think...but not to the point where it makes me change the way I do something.

For example...whenever I know someone is coming over, I make sure my house is tidy. Unfortunately, the life of a mom and author does not lend me tons of time to just keep my home spotless all the time. If you stop by unannounced, you'll most likely find dirty dishes in the sink, toys everywhere, the dining room table littered with junk. But if someone is coming over, I clean up. It's not that I want people to think I always keep an immaculate home...I just have respect for others and want to offer them a clean and tidy place to visit.

And my appearance...I like to look good. I just do. It makes me feel good to look good. Life isn't about the clothes people wear or fancy hairdos, but taking the time to make yourself look presentable shows you respect yourself. And when people look at me, I want my appearance to say that I am organized, mature, and I know what I'm doing. And if they think I'm pretty or sexy too....well, that's quite all right with me! Can't help it...I love to feel pretty!!! I watch What Not to Wear on TLC quite frequently and it never ceases to amaze me that so many women feel unimportant and ugly. They've given up on appearance and are amazed when they do take a few minutes for themselves at how much better and confident they feel. All women should feel beautiful and have confidence.

As an author who is starting to do appearances and signings, the way I look means a lot. It matters what people think of me. A first impression says a lot, and when someone first lays eyes on you...before one word is even spoken...they can tell a lot just from your appearance.

Last summer I threw a big party at my house for the release of A Bitch Named Karma. I'd invited all my friends and family, my writers group members too. One of my writer friends told me I looked glamorous. I'd chosen a special outfit to wear for the party- a teal-colored ruffled sleeveless top, a dark pencil skirt, strappy sandals and chunky beaded jewelry. She said I looked exactly like the kind of woman she'd want to buy a romance novel from. Her statement meant a lot to me. And made me think. The way you look can even say something about your work. If I'd been dressed in a beige pair of pants, a plain shirt, no jewelry, that would have said something completely different about me. If I wore something boring like that to a signing...would I draw in as many people??

I am attending my first ever book event as an author- The Buffalo Small Press Book Fair. I'll be signing books and selling copies too. There will be many people there from our arts community. I need to look like a fabulous author!!! I need to look like I belong. I need others to look at me and think I look like someone important...someone they should get to know!


  1. I'm sort of in a 'I really don't care what you think' mode, right now. My apartment is a shambles, and I'll clean if I know someone's coming, for sure. I just think that's the right thing to do, really. But as far as people liking me? I'm totally okay if people don't.

    I really only have concern about people liking my work, my writing.

  2. So jeans and t-shirt are out for my (far, far in the future) book signing gig?

    Bummer. But I still refuse to wear make-up - well, unless the ETW crew insist for camera lighting . .

    I hear ya, Steph. I tell it to my co-workers all the time when they are interviewing for promotions within the agency. Its not that people don't already know who you are, what you do, how you portray yourself on a daily basis; its that they want to know you CARE enough about yourself and THEM to put in a little extra effort.

    Everyone likes to feel important to you. A little really does go a long way.


  3. Miss M...I hear what you're saying, but if people don't like you think they'll give your work a chance??? I think no. I don't go out of my way to make people like me or be fake to get new friends...but I do my best to always be polite and treat people the way I want to be treated. Hopefully that helps me be well-liked!! LOL!!

    LOL Donna!! I think jeans and a tee shirt are out!! Makeup is not too big of a deal if done correctly. :)