Clearing My Head

Sometimes there is so much going on in my brain, or sometimes nothing, which is not good when I need it to have something. During those time I just need to clear my head.

As a writer, I'm often faced with a blank page...that blinking cursor. And there are times it's fantastic. That cursor moves like you wouldn't believe. I make so many typing mistakes because my fingers are moving so fast getting the story out of my head before it disappears, lost in the sea of things floating around in there.

But there are those other times where the blinking cursor is a curse. I don't know what to do next. I don't know where I need to take my characters. Sometimes it's during the creating phase. I have reformed and am now a plotter, but even though I have the entire book planned, it's sometimes difficult to bridge together the scenes I've thought up. Or during the editing phase, when I know I need to fix something, but the solution is just not coming to me.

I need a brain break. And it's not uncommon for me to take several in a day's time. Just short little vacations where my brain can rest and do absolutely nothing worthwhile. And yes...my brain takes it's vacations in Twitterland, Facebookville, and Pinterest City.

I know many people consider these social media sites a complete waste of time. I don't, for many reasons, but I won't go into them all today. Today I am focusing on the break they give my brain. I can go on Twitter and have a laugh, see what my writer buddies are doing, promo myself, help promo a friend. I only stay a minute or two. Then I hop over to Facebook, see what my family and friends are up to today. Stay there a couple minutes. Then maybe some Pinterest for yummy meal ideas or crafts.

My brain takes maybe a 5 minute break and is ready to get back at it. Stepping away form my work, even for a few minutes, can often give me new perspective. It really helps!

Do you take mini breaks while you're writing, or doing whatever job you do? Does it help clear your mind and make you more productive? What do you do on your mini breaks?

Social media makes us LESS social?? I disagree.

Today I came across this Tweet: "If you think that social media, despite the name, hasn't made us less social than ever... you've got rocks in your head."

I think I get what the Tweeter is saying...that people rely too much on social media to communicate and less on actual face to face conversations and phone calls. But I really and truly think social media has made me closer and more in tune with my friends and family.

First of all....Facebook has allowed me to keep in touch with family members from all over the country...even the world. My cousin's husband was stationed in Germany for three years. Facebook allowed me and my cousin to stay in contact and chat whenever we wanted. It's been a long time since we've lived in the same town and FB made it possible for us to become close. And now that she's in Hawaii for the next 3 years, I can still keep in close contact with her. I am able to be a part of my friend's daily lives who no longer live in this area. It allowed me to get to know a cousin I never really knew because she was born and grew up a few states away. Until FB, I had only even seen her a few times in my life. Now, in our mid 30's, I can finally consider her a real friend.

Secondly, I am a mom with a career and kids with activities who has friends with careers and families and activities. I do not have time to go have coffee with every one of my friends and family members each week to see how they are and catch up on their lives. As much as I would love to. Life is different these days. It's not like the 50's when most moms were home all day and could get together and chat. But you know what? I can hop on Facebook for twenty minutes and be caught up on all my friends and their families and what they're doing, have a few laughs, view some photos.

Third, social media has allowed me the opportunity to make friends all over the country and world, who I never would have had the chance to meet otherwise. Wonderful and amazing people. Sometimes you need to go outside your circle of friends to find the support and camaraderie you need. I am a writer and no one I knew in my day to day life did that. I found a writers group in my city from an online community. And they were great. I adored them. But still, none wrote what I wrote and I really craved kinship with those like me. And I found them. Social media helps people to not feel alone. There are people out there just like you, loving what you love, no matter what it is. And technology has allowed us to connect easily.

So, I don't know what you all think, but I guess I have rocks in my head. I am so so thankful for what social media has done for me. No, it's not perfect and it has its drawbacks, but when used properly, it is amazing. There has to be balance, just like all things in life. It should not replace all human interaction, but it is great for when face to face human interaction just isn't possible. But when you are in the presence of other humans, the phones should be put away.

Is Twitter for you?

I started a Twitter account a while back...and I won't lie. It's main purpose was to stalk follow celebrities. It was pretty cool to read the daily thoughts of people I admired and idolized.

But then I started realizing it might be a good idea to get on there and network with many of my fellow authors. So I started a new account, since the first was not my actual name. (The one I use now is @stephanihaefner, in case you wanna go follow me!) I started following writers I already knew and agents I wanted. I started making lots of friends and it started to be really fun. I gained a small following and it was so cool. And yeah, I still follow celebrities ;)

So is Twitter for everyone? No. It really depends on what you want to gain from social networking.

If you want to share photo albums, keep in touch with family and friends, send lengthy private messages, and organize events, Facebook is definitely far better for all that. Twitter is tough, with it's 140 character limit and all.

If you want to meet new people with similar interests, Twitter is the place. In my opinion, since Twitter has a very limited profile page--bio is all you have and it's pretty short-- to me it feels a bit more private. There's no pics of me, accept my one profile pic. There's none of my kids. It's simple. And I feel like it's a better place to converse with people you don't know in real life, if that makes any kind of sense.

If you're looking to network and meet people in your line of business, Twitter is DEFINITELY the place to be. I have made SOOOOOOO many connections there and found out about so many opportunities. Invaluable! :)

And if you want to stalk celebrities, definitely check Twitter out! :) It really is cool :) And you just never know when one will actually reply to you! Just today I was beyond ecstatic to get a RT (that's retweet, for those of you not versed in Twitter-speak) and a direct Tweet from Josh Henderson, one of the hotties on the new Dallas (the hottest, IMHO!) Many celebs post pics you wouldn't get to see otherwise. Very cool stuff :)

If you like to keep up on news, current events, anything happening in the world or in your town, with up-to-the-minute posts, Twitter is for you. I follow several news outlets, including my local newspaper. They update throughout the day with breaking news.

I really love Twitter...far more than I ever expected.

So, do you Twitter? Why? What do you like about it? What do you hate?

I tried, but I had to just give in....

I think most of us struggle with what we should be doing versus what we are actually doing. I know I do. Every day. There's no mom on earth that doesn't feel some guilt in working when they should be spending time with their kids...or playing with their kids, when they should be working. While I do struggle with that guilt, I'm talking about a different guilt today.

The lure of the internet.

Each day, I have many things I need to do. And yes, that list does include Facebook, Twitter, Blog writing and reading and commenting, email, etc.. Where most people look at these social media outlets as a "time suck", I happen to think differently. I need these outlets to network and promote myself. So, doing these things does actually have a purpose for me. It's helping to get my name and face out there and in turn, sell books.

But, I do also need to actually work on my writing projects each day too. That is equally as important.

And I tried, very hard, to do my editing and writing first each day. I once read that every writer should do an hour of just writing or editing each day, then turn to social networking. Yeah....didn't work so well for me. I just could not concentrate, knowing that there were unread emails out there, Facebook posts to read, blog posts to read and comments to reply to. I just could not keep my mind on my work with all those other things sitting there, waiting for me.

So I decided not to even try anymore. I do what I need with email, FB, Twitter, etc... I do that all first. Yes, it takes time. A lot of time. But when I am finally to a point where I can say "I'm good" I can shut them down and concentrate COMPLETELY on my work.

I do still take mini-breaks from the editing...you have to. The eyes go buggy after a while. I pop into FB or Twitter for like 2 minutes.

What do you guys do?? Work first, network later?? Or are you like me???

Twitter and Facebook- I need you all!!!

I've decided to host a giveaway! Two, actually!!!! I am not happy about the number of Twitter and Facebook fanpage followers I have. I need to do something about it!!!!

So...I've decided to give away a couple signed copies of A Bitch Named Karma! When each of my accounts reaches 200 followers, I will randomly draw one follower who will win the book!! And if for some chance the winner already has the book, instead they will receive signed copies of both Chicken Soup for the Soul books I am featured in!!

Here is my Facebook Fanpage link.

And here is my Twitter page.

Thanks in advance for all your help!!!!

And while you're at it, please check out this great contest at Project 52! She's giving away The Hunger Games trilogy!!

Social networking and our opinions

I think most people frequent at least one from of social networking- Twitter, Facebook, Myspace, etc..., whether it be for business reasons or purely for pleasure. I visit these places for both reasons. Some weigh more toward one reason than the other, but I do it because I enjoy it. And I like interacting with others.

BUT.....

Everyone has their chance to say whatever is on their mind....whenever they want. Opinions on anything and everything. And we all have our opinions, which are different from what others think. So when we open ourselves up by posting our thoughts.....it's expected that others will respond with their opposite opinions, right????

When I post something, I do it with the knowledge that someone may think differently and share their thoughts. I normally don't mind....I don't expect or want everyone to think the same as I do. I don't mind a good debate as long as all parties remain open-minded and things don't get nasty.

When you post, do you expect to get a range of comments back?? Does it bother you if someone disagrees with you?? Since it is your post, if someone doesn't agree, should they just not comment??

There are many times I have a different opinion that what someone has posted and I wonder if I really should comment. I try my hardest to always post my opinions in a concise and respectful way. But as we all know, words on a screen are often misconstrued.

Facebook....love it but it seems like it's going down hill.

I was not the first of my friends to join Facebook, but was definitely ahead of most. It was the coolest thing ever! I had been on Myspace before and that was cool then...but FB was so much better!! I loved the status updates...little tidbits of my friend's lives. I loved being able to log in and scroll through...maybe 15-20 minutes of my time, and be instantly updated on all my friend's lives.

I reconnected with friends from years ago and even my friends now, and was able to talk with them on a daily basis. And other friends who were merely acquaintances before had now become a friend.

Whenever there was a party or some event, it was always a race to see who could post their pictures on FB first and we'd all tag and comment on the pictures! So so cool!!

But now...seems like FB isn't what it used to be. And that makes me so sad. It was perfect for me. I could get on at 10 am or 10 pm and catch up on everyone's posts and comment on them. Seems people aren't on like they used to...people aren't updating their statuses or commenting on mine. I Twitter, but it's no where near the same.

I started my FB Fanpage a while back and have some fans that aren't people I actually know in real life. that is pretty cool! :) if you're not a fan and would like to be....check me out here!

So what are your thoughts on Facebook??? Love it, hate it.....sad that's it seems to be on the decline??? I know I am :(

Be my Facebook Fan!!!

Hi all! Just trying another way to connect with people! Here s the link to my fan page on Facebook: Stephanie Haefner

Do you have one??? If so, please respond with the link!!!

Do you do Facebook???

I used to be a huge Myspacer...but it got old after a while. Then poeple started migrating to Facebook. I didn't know what the heck it was and wasn't interested. And then I checked it out about a year and a half ago...took some getting used to...but now I am I love!!! I log in several times a day and really really enjoy reading little snippets and updates from my friends, seeing their pictures and sharing mine. I feel far more connected with the poeple in my life because of Facebook. Some I just don't get to see in real life as often as I'd like. And catching up with old friends is priceless. You lose touch with people over time...it just happens, and Facebook helps make the reconnections possible!

And I can't deny the awesome networking capabilities!!! Wanna be my fan???

http://www.facebook.com/home.php?ref=home#/pages/Stephanie-Haefner/99513980888?v=wall&viewas=652197599&ref=search