Monday, August 31, 2009

I just don't know what to blog about!!

I am in edit mode and I don't think readers want to know the details of my no no word "search and destroy" missions that I have been doing for weeks. Seems like a boring thing to read about.

So what does one blog about when one doesn't have anything exciting to blog about???

My personal life?

We've had a low key summer...saving money so we can take a Disney trip the end of September. I was very excited to get our travel documents in the mail the other day!!! Just waiting on our airport to resort transfers and luggage tags. Yesterday we went to a local arts festival, bought a bag of not so great kettle corn. Wish I had tons and tons of money to support the AMAZING local artists we have in Buffalo, NY. Finished up back to school and fall/winter clothes shopping for the family: Thank You Old Navy Stuff N' Save Bag!!

The kiddos?

My daughter will be starting 1st grade on Thursday...she's getting so big and so smart! My son is 19 months old, starting to talk up a storm and sometimes he does bad things but they're just so darn funny!

The weather?

We had a mostly rainy summer...got nicer as we rolled into August, but now it's getting chilly. Yesterday was only about 64...and it was darn cold out. I had to wear a sweater (albeit a thin one) and ended up covering it with a thin hooded sweatshirt thingy when it started sprinkling at the arts festival.

My editing?

Today I performed "search and destroy" missions for "just" and "then". I really really really must have this thing submitted to my editor before I leave for Disney. I got 29 days!!

Anything else??? Want to know anything about me????

What about you? What do you blog about when you are out of ideas and have nothing exciting to report??

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

I almost cried happy tears!!!!

http://lyricalpress.blogspot.com/2009/08/editor-profile-piper-denna.html

This blog was posted over at Lyrical Press today...an interview with my editor.....go ahead....read the answer to the first question........

Yup...that's me she's talking about!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

In case you don't want to click the site, she says: "
I've got lots of great names on my roster list. One title which I'm very excited about, though, is Bitch Named Karma, a really fun chick-lit novel."

It is so unbelievable amazing to find someone who is as excited about my novel as I am...and I waited sooo long to get to this point. Each step I make in this journey feel so amazingly right!!! I've felt so much heartbreak with rejection...but maybe they were meant to be. Maybe none of those agents or publishers were right for me.

Monday, August 24, 2009

Summer is almost over...back to a clean cut routine...YESSSSSSSSSSSS!

I thrive on a routine. I am that kind of person. That's just the way I've been my whole life. Disorganization is what irks me. I like things planned out and it ruins my mood when things don't go as they're supposed to. Some people hate having to do this and that and do it at a certain time...not me. This is comfort for me.

While summer has been fun and lazy, I am really looking forward to structured days. I can't wait to get back into a definite wake and bed time for the kids. I am not a morning person and while I have really enjoyed waking later and not to an alarm clock.....it makes the rest of the day unpredictable. If my son wakes at 9 am instead of 8, that pushes naptime back and then possibly bedtime too. And more structured mealtimes too.

Hopefully I will get into a really good writing routine. I'll get my 2-1/2 to 3 hours while my son naps after lunch...but that is just not enough.

Friday, August 21, 2009

Laundry Baskets

I realized this morning as I folded and put away clean clothes that I have been using the same laundry baskets for 14 years. I bought them right about this time in the summer of 1995...I was gathering things I would need when I went away to college. I bought these baskets at a discount store...the price tag is still on one of them: $1.39. These laundry baskets have been through everything with me...going away to school and being away from home for the first time ever, carrying clothes down to the wash room in my dorm. A few years later they moved with me to the first house we bought; we moved in 2 days after we returned home from our honeymoon. Over the years these baskets held honeymoon clothes, clothes after other various trips and vacations, officer's uniforms, dance attire, golf wear, fancy clothes from weddings, mourning clothes from funerals, warm clothes in winter, shorts and tanks in summer....then baby clothes. These baskets held multiple loads of freshly washed pink baby girl clothes. The baby girl clothes got bigger and bigger then once again the baskets began holding maternity clothes. The baskets moved with us again to our newer, bigger house and began holding baby boy clothes.

These baskets, these cheap pieces of molded plastic have been through 14 years of my life. And if you look at them now...not one single tear or crack. That's why I've never gotten rid of them...they are so strong and dependable...these baskets that only cost me $1.39....

Can we say the same for other things in our lives??? How many things, things that cost way more money, have to be replaced every couple years or so. I look around my living room right now...TV- a year old. Our old TV didn't even make it to 10 years old....it died on us. And what about the things we replace just because...the couch I sit on is only a year a half old...we bought new furniture when we moved. The old furniture was still okay...it sagged in the middle of the cushions a bit and the light fabric was permanently stained...but it was still useable (it sits in our finished basement).

But these baskets.....they just amaze me. I wonder what kind of laundry will be in them over the next 14 years.....

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Do you ever stop seeking your parent's approval??

My parents were so proud when I went off to college...neither of them have even graduated high school...it was the 60's...it wasn't a huge deal back then...they both had jobs, not anything fancy or high paying, but we survived. So, going to college was a huge deal. I got grants, some small scholarships/awards...but it didn't cover everything. Mom and dad had to take out a loan that they had to start paying on right away.

Two years later I graduated with my Associates degree in Floriculture Merchandising. I immediately began working on my field as a floral designer. My school loan deferrment period ended and I started paying it back...I offered to pay back my parent's loan too...they refused.

I worked as a floral designer for several years, in flower shops and then on my own when I started my home-based business. For much of it, I loved it...I had passion for it.....I wanted to be a big success. Then reality set in as I worked hours and hours for very little money. My husband and I debated on opening a store...but that only meant more overhead and no garantee on making more money. Around that time I started writing and fell in love with it. I found myself at a crossroads, either keep on doing what I was doing, or make a career change. If I'd been making a boatload of money, the decision would have been easy. In the end, there were just too many cons to keeping the business, so I closed up shop. After 10 years in the floral industry, I was done...and my school loans were finally paid off!

Then I told my parents my decision. My mom understood....she wanted me to be happy...and she reads a lot so she was excited for me. I showed her my small successes at the time...a couple flash fiction publications and told her about my acceptance for an anthology. Dad....he just didn't get it. He didn't understand why I was giving up my business. He asked if I was going back to work at a flower shop....I told him no. He wanted to know if I was getting some other kind of job. He didn't understand the writing thing.

He dropped it after that, but I felt like I had dissappointed him. Money has always been tight for them, so I know how big of a deal it was for him to pay the school loan they took out for me.

I've told him about my publishing deal...but still...it's not going to be a physical book that will be sold in a book store...it's not a product he an hold. (I'm being epublished).

I hope someday he can understand what I do now and I hope I'll have significant success to prove to him my decision was not a wrong one....and that although I no longer do what my education taught me...it wasn't a waste. I'm still a success and that path led me to where I am now.

Monday, August 17, 2009

Should I give truthful reviews????

I love to read and try to do it often....though time for it is limited to maybe a 1/2 hour or so before bed. I've had an account on Goodreads.com for quite some time now (Are you on?? Look me up and we can be friends!!) So anyway, I really love reading other people's reviews on books I've read and seeing their take on them. I always write reviews on books I read and I'm truthful...from a reader's standpoint and also a writer's standpoint. I point out things that confused me as a reader and also things that could have been better, in my humble opinion, as a writer....things like plot and such.

But after this last book, and giving it only a so so review, I started wondering...is this something I should be doing???? As a writer who is just starting out, should I be writing negative things about my fellow writer's books???? I am never nasty in my critiques, but I'm truthful. If I didn't like something, I say it. But the last thing I want to do is damage future bonds with fellow writers.

My book is not published yet, but when it is, I am fully prepared for some negative criticism.....it's inevitable. You can't please everybody. And I wouldn't want anyone to lie to me.

Follow me on Twitter!!!!!!!!!!!! I'll follow you too!!

FINALLY I started a Twitter account for my writing friends and fans. I have a personal one...for following celebrities and a few friends...just something fun to do. But I read about all these people using it to make all kinds of professional connections!! I need to get me some of that!!!!!

Follow me and will follow you!!

https://twitter.com/StephaniHaefner

Sunday, August 16, 2009

Summer's Theme: Too much to do, not enough time

I feel like the summer is flying by. It dragged for a while.....ever since I booked my trip (we booked in June, leaving Sept. 30th). Our weather was really awful for most of the summer...rain, rain and more rain...then it finally got nice. And it started flying by. We had nothing going all summer...then August hit and we've had plans every Saturday. School starts in a little over two weeks. Been shopping and preparing for that. Been planning and preparing for our trip. I've been trying to devote as much time as humanly possible to editing...which gets tough. By the time the kids are in bed, I'm exhausted...and I just don't edit well when I'm tired...it's like my brain can't properly function. My blog has been neglected and I HATE that! (Sorry guys!!)

Why oh why can't I survive on 2 hours of sleep??????

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

I hate when this happens!!!!!!!

I was sitting here reading blogs, making some comments...you know....doing the whole blogging thing. Then an idea popped in my head for a great blog! I was going to start it right away, but I said to myself, "No, let's finish reading these one first."

Big mistake....

Idea is gone....buh bye.....

*Sigh*

This has happened to me on more than one occasion. I get a great story idea and I don't have a pen and paper handy...so I tell myself it's okay and I'll remember it. Nope...I never do. If it's not out of my brain and on paper immediately it's forgotten.

I have an entire file on my computer devoted to story ideas. Each one of my flashes of inspiration get turned into a file...some get names...like one idea..all I have is a name. Others get named "Untitled" and are assigned a number (the last got #14). I type whatever came into my mind...a plot-line, a situation, sometimes even a few lines of dialog, whatever....Then when I'm ready to start a new project, my ideas are there waiting for me.

What do you do with the ideas that float into your brain???

Questions about the writer's life.....

My fellow blogger friend Rebecca Knight posted these questions and her own answers on her blog today: http://rebeccaknightbooks.blogspot.com/2009/08/goals-how-do-you-know-when-youre.html
Her answers were very intriguing and inspired me to blog about them too!

Here are the questions and my answers!

1) Why am I writing?

I write because story ideas float into my brain and I need to get the ideas on paper (or computer screen). I truly enjoy creating my own little world and sharing my stories with people. I feel so satisfied when someone tells me they loved a story I wrote or could identify with one of my characters. I write becuase I love to give the reader someone to identify with and a story they can lose themselves in...a story that makes them laugh and cry and feel a whole range of emotions.

2) How long do I want to do this, even if I never get any credit or money from my work?

As long as I have the motivation...and right now I have boatloads of it!

3) How much rejection can I take?

So far, I've taken a lot. There were many times I asked myself what the point of putting myself through it all was. Would I be doing this year after year...and never get anywhere? My self pity is usually short lived and I snap out of and find the determination to get back to work, hone my craft, make the next project even better...the ONE that will catch someone's attention!

4) How much time do I want to spend on my goals, versus with my family, friends, and pillow?

I try to balance it all. I will not give up quality time with my family, but they also understand that writing is an important part of my life, just as anyone's career is. My family is proud of me and they do what they can to give me the time I need to work on my writing. As far as the pillow goes....when i only had one kid....I had no problems staying up late and writing till 2 am....but nwo that I;m a few years older and have a second child....can;t work that late anymroe! Once I am tired...I find it really hard to be creative. Some days are doiferent than others. If I am in writing/creative mode...I get in a groove and I find it hard to stop. But if I am in editing mode (like now) if I'm tired, I find it hard to concentrate.

5) What do I want to achieve Big Picture?

I want to walk into Borders or Barnes and Noble and see my book sitting on one of the tables when you walk in or see it on the Best Seller shelf. I want to overhear soemone talking about "how good this book is" and see them pick it up and recommend it to their friend...and it's my book they are talking about. I want to be someone's favorite author. I want to make money doing something I love...something that brings me this much joy! And not millions...just enough to make us comfortable and not always worrying about money!

6) Will I be satisfied when I get there?

Yes! I hope so! But who knows...when that happens (and I say "when" because I sincerely hope I will never ever give up on this dream)...maybe I will want more and I will make a new goal!

7) Am I satisfied if I never get there?

I don't know. Probably not.

8) What steps do I have to take to achieve that Big Picture thing?

I need to find an agent, who will sell my book to a print publisher. I've already gotten my foot in with an ePublisher..so I'm super excited about that!! I'm hoping that after I pubblish a few books with them, that will help me land an agent. As ecstatic as I am to be epublished (and I truly do believe it's the future of publishing) I don't think I will ever lose my desire to hold my printed book in my hands.

9) Which one needs to be achieved first?

Well, I signed a contract with an ePublisher, so I guess that means step 1 has been achieved!!

10) What is my support system?

My husband, my family, my girlfriends (who love to read everything I write and give me very useful feedback), my writers group (my writing soulmates), and all my blogging friends in cyberspace!!

11) How will I feel if I never achieve this? Is it worth trying anyway?

I will be sad but I've already achieved way more than I thought I would. I am happy with where I am so far and if this is as far as I go, I will be happy. But if I never see my name in print on the cover of my novel...I know I'll never feel quite as accomplished as I want. Is it worth trying anyway?? Yes. I'll always have these stories...published or not. I have somehting to leave behind when I'm gone.

What are your answers???

Monday, August 10, 2009

Brings a tear to my eye....

My daughter is 6...she'll be starting 1st grade in a few weeks. She reminds me of myself in sooooooooooooooo many ways and I watch her and hope she'll grow up to be like me. I think I have a pretty good head on my shoulders and I'm organized. I've always been a good girl.

But I see my husband in her too and while I love him completely...we are opposites on many things.

So anyway, one thing my daughter does not possess...like me...is much athleticism. I was the girl picked either last or second last in gym class and when we played games, I was never passed the ball or given much of a chance to participate..cause frankly I sucked and no one gave the sucky girl a chance to play and therefore give our team a better shot at losing. I pray my daughter will not have to bear this embarrassment, but I am sure it's bound to happen. She started soccer last week (by her request and I obliged because I want her to try all kinds of things and be a well rounded human being). They had their first practice and she loved every minute and had the hugest smile on her face. That right there was worth it to me. But I've watched the kid for the past 6-1/2 years and watched her on that field last week...she doesn't always pay attention and she just does not have that sportiness that the other kids have. She doesn't seem to have the determination to play hard. Maybe with practice, she'll find it.....as long as she's having fun, I'm happy.

Now I'll tell you where she has tons of determination....I could give this girl a box of crayons and a coloring book and she'd fill in the entire thing in a matter of an hour. Or give her a notepad, she'll not only draw pictures, but she'll add a story to go with it. One of my proudest moments and this was before she could even read or write...she wanted to make a book. She drew pictures and asked me to write her words. Then she learned to write on her own and once she started learning to read.....she took off and I am so proud of what she can do now.

I think my girl is gonna be artsy!

Wednesday, August 5, 2009

Huge disappointment...

I think this story pertains to a lot of things in life. Sometimes no matter what you put into something, no matter how much work or how much you think it is a sure thing... disappointment can still happen.

I prepared a crock pot meal for dinner tonight. I have a great little cookbook that is all low-fat crock pot recipes. Found tons of great meals in that thing!! So when I was preparing my menu for this week and picking out new recipes to try, I perused this book. I found 4 never-tried recipes to add to my list. I decided to use one of them today. My daughter had her first soccer practice at 5:45. No way we could wait till afterward...my son goes to bed at 7:30-8, no way we could be eating dinner at that time. So I decided we'd eat a light lunch and have an early dinner....we had some errands to run before dinner, so crock pot was perfect...it'd be ready to eat when we were.

I followed the recipe to a tee...chopped everything up, put it all in just like it said...and turned it on. It said low for only 3 hours. Sounded a bit funny, but the meat was precooked (turkey kielbasa) so I went with it, against my better judgment. We go out, we run to the stores we needed to go to and returned home. The kids play outside while hubby is doing some yard work. I'm getting things ready for soccer and dinner. 4:30 comes and I check on the food....potatoes are hard as a rock. There is no time to make something else. I leave it on, we get ready and leave the house and do a Mickey D's run and eat it at the park before soccer practice. (If you've never had their Southwest Salad with grilled chicken...yum! Very low in fat!!)

We get home at 7:45 and I check the food. Figured we could save it and eat it tomorrow..or hubby could take it for work...whatever. Um, no. It was the blandest meal I have ever made in my life. Every ounce of flavor from the sausage was removed...not exactly sure how that happened.....and though the potatoes were perfectly cooked....they had zero flavor.

Lesson learned: Go with my gut first of all...if I would have cooked it on high it would have been done. Second..... always be prepared. You never know how things will turn out.

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Do you keep a journal???

Or is blogging it??

I have kept a diary/journal since I was about 8 or so. Someone gave me a small pink book for my birthday with a little brass lock and key and it had a ballerina on the front. The edges of the paper were gold...and it was just so so pretty! I didn't write often, but from time to time I scribbled down some of my preteen feelings. Then the teen years hit and I spilled every single detail of my life to my diary, every single day (and had to expand into more pretty little locked books....multiple volumes of my life). It became something I HAD to do and sometimes it was the only place I could vent out my deepest darkest fears, misery and frustration...I'm sure you remember high school drama.

I kept my diary writing till I was about 18 or so....and met my husband to be. My diary entries were further and further apart...and eventually I stopped all together. I thought it was because I had met my soul mate and no longer needed to spill my thoughts into a book...I had someone to share it all with.

Time passed....our wedding, our first home, trips, adventures, a baby.....and I realized that none of it...or my feelings about it all....had been documented. So while I no longer needed someone to share my feelings with, what I did miss was keeping the 'history of my life'.

I so enjoy reading my old diaries...though some of it drags on and on about certain boys I obsessed about....but I skip though some of that!! But my history is there...where I went, what I did...things with family and friends...and every entry dated.

So I started a new journal in a notebook. It just wasn't working. I spent so much time on the computer....so why not do it there. I've been doing that for almost 3 years now. And though I don't write everyday...sometimes I go weeks without, I try my best to keep it updated with the events of my life and my feelings about them. I add pictures and things too....just like I did with my old diaries....movie stubs, photo booth pics, newspaper clippings, I had it all in those little books :)

I do try and update my blog as often as possible...and decided to add those to my journal too...So some days have a regular journaling plus a copy and pasted blog post.

And I started journals for my kids. Baby books only have so much room...and so much happens after that first year or so....I write down the funny things they say and the things they do that make me so happy. Someday they'll have so much interesting stuff to read...my life...an autobiography of sorts...

Monday, August 3, 2009

Do you listen to music while you write???

I know tons of writers who feel completely inspired when they’re writing to Metallica, Beethoven, Jay Z, Brittany Spears….whatever floats their boat. Me…I just can’t do it. Music certainly inspires me….songwriting is poetry set to words, no matter what the genre…rap, pop, metal…it’s all art as far as I’m concerned. And since I started writing seriously, I listen to the words of songs much more intently than I ever did before and I appreciate the heart and soul that went into them. It’s not easy to put one’s insides into something…then put it out there for judgment.

But I just cannot concentrate on my own writing if there is other stuff going on around me. I am writing this blog with the music for my blog playing in the background. And I LOVE the music (it’s the NKOTB medley) and I totally want to abandon my cocoon and dance around my living room, belting out every lyric I’ve known by heart since I was 11 years old. But writing to it…even just a blog, is kinda difficult. For me anyway.

Silence seems to be my muse. Nothing gets me typing faster than complete silence. I can hear my characters voices better…see their faces more clearly….envision their actions without distraction.

Sunday, August 2, 2009

Fellow writers..HELP!! I need some advice!!!!!

I'm sitting her editing and came across a comical scene in my MS where a character does a Michael Jackson impression, including some genital grabbing. In light of MJ's death and the sensitivity of so many fans out there...should I remove this??? I'm in no way making fun of him....just using some of his dance moves.

Here's the small paragraph describing the scene:

The guy started doing a Michael Jackson impression, moon walking and zombie-dancing all over the place. I burst out laughing when he grabbed his balls and let out a high pitched “Wooo!”.

Do you do Facebook???

I used to be a huge Myspacer...but it got old after a while. Then poeple started migrating to Facebook. I didn't know what the heck it was and wasn't interested. And then I checked it out about a year and a half ago...took some getting used to...but now I am I love!!! I log in several times a day and really really enjoy reading little snippets and updates from my friends, seeing their pictures and sharing mine. I feel far more connected with the poeple in my life because of Facebook. Some I just don't get to see in real life as often as I'd like. And catching up with old friends is priceless. You lose touch with people over time...it just happens, and Facebook helps make the reconnections possible!

And I can't deny the awesome networking capabilities!!! Wanna be my fan???

http://www.facebook.com/home.php?ref=home#/pages/Stephanie-Haefner/99513980888?v=wall&viewas=652197599&ref=search