As a parent, we are all wired to think our children are the cutest, the smartest, the funniest....they're the apples of our eyes. We shower them with unconditional love and would do anything for them. But I think a good parent also needs to see their child's flaws. No one is perfect and it is wrong to put that kind of stress on anyone, let alone a child. All kids have their tantrums and pick their noses and say things they shouldn't. And if you are a parent who is too blind to see that...if you think your child is perfection and it's all the other kids who are little demons, well.....you're setting yourself and your child up for disaster.And I think the same can be said for your MS. We pour ourselves into our work...they too are our "babies". We give them so much care and time and we're so invested in them. They are part of us. But we have to be able to stand back and accept that no matter how much we want them to be, our MS's are not perfect. They all have flaws...even multi-published authors who bring in six-digit advances.
I truly believe you will never ever get anywhere in this business unless you can accept the fact that no matter how many years and tears you have put into your novel, it will need fixing. We are too close to it to see it's flaws sometimes. That's why every writer needs support, whether it be a writers group that meets in person or online or even just a critique partner who can lend some advice. Another set of eyes to help point out holes and grammar and tiny little inconsistencies. And if you do reach your publishing goal and land a super agent and sell to a big time NY publishing house...guess what?? You will still need an editor, maybe even two or three, to help you fine tune the story and make it the best it can be. (Though even then, it will still not be perfect.)
So now I'm only left to wonder what to do with those parents who think their child is an angel and mine the devil, ready to corrupt their perfect little darling. Don't think they'll take too kindly to some critique on that one.
Posts
Although I don't have kids, I know what you mean! I need to know my WIP's weaknesses so I can fix them! It's so hard for me to look at it objectively.
ReplyDeleteVery true. Although we think of our children as angels, that's not always the case! As for writing, our stories are our babies but sometimes the diaper needs changing. (this isn't mine, it's from Dan Reitz (he said it during a publishing talk at EPIcon earlier this year)). I love that because it's so true!
ReplyDeleteYES!! That is so true!!!!!! Great analogy!!
ReplyDeleteWell, I'm not someone who thinks my kids are perfect-because none of us are perfect! That said-I'm also not the type to excuse everything with a "kids will be kids" attitude, either. I have high expectations for my kids, myself...everything I do. Making mistakes is how we learn and grow-so we all need to do a lot of that. But we also need to learn to do it with class and humility.
ReplyDeleteI agree. I hear so many people say "Oh, that's just how boys are." Well, I really don't want my son to be an aggressive monster who tackles people all the time. Letting them be kids is one thing, but there is a line.
ReplyDeleteI totally disagree with the whole "boys are just like that" excuse. I've done daycare for 11+ years and I can tell you-there are girls "like that" and there are boys who are sweet and kind and timid and gentle. It's more just personality and parenting. I think anything that is an excuse for a behaviour is a cop out.
ReplyDeleteExactly.
ReplyDelete