Saturday, July 17, 2010

The Blogfest of Death- Better late than never??

****I feel so horrible!! This was supposed to be posted earlier today, but unfortunately, I was having some internet issues. :( I sincerely apologize!!!!

I did a blogfest a few months ago and I quite enjoyed it! Very fun to participate in!!!

But when I came across this one at Tessa's Blurb, I wasn't sure if it was for me. Death??? I don't write paranormal stuff or action adventure type of stories, so death is not something I really write on a regular basis. But I do from time to time. Most of my writing is true to life type stories, and unfortunately, death is a part of life.

So for this Blogfest, I am sharing this scene with you. I can't say enjoy...cause it's really sad, but some feedback would be wonderful. :)

The party guests had congregated near the kitchen to see what the drama was and I suddenly felt like a monumental ass. Half hour into the party and I had already ruined my little man’s perfect day. Never in my life had I wanted to be anything like my mother, until that moment. Her parties were always perfect. She never burnt a single thing.

I turned and walked toward the bathroom, needing to get away from all the eyes before I burst into tears. Two months in and the pregnancy hormones were already working overtime. I blew my nose and re-powdered my face. Might as well pee too, since I was already in there. As I pulled on the toilet paper, I noticed a very bright dot on the center of my very plain underwear.

So much for not bursting into tears.

A knock came on the door. “Lex, you okay?”

“Get in here!” I yelled to Rich through my sobs, not caring if I sounded hysterical.

“It’s okay,” he said after closing the door behind him. “No one cares about the food.”

“Look!” I showed him my underwear and the pea-sized spot. His eyes widened like flying saucers.

“That’s bad, isn’t it?”

“Yes…no. I don’t know!”

He knelt in front of me and pulled me to him. “What can I do?”

“Can you get my pregnancy book from the night stand?” I managed to calm myself down and think rationally. I thought for sure I had read about spotting in the first trimester.

Rich brought the book in to me and I flipped to one of the early chapters. I then read from the book. “Pink spotting is common during the first trimester, and is usually caused by the egg implanting into the lining of the uterus.”

“But this is bright red,” Rich said, stating the obvious. I scanned further down the page.

“The most frightening type of spotting or bleeding during the first trimester is fresh blood, or bright red. While this can be serious, it is not always confirmation that a miscarriage is occurring.” I looked up at Rich, both of us wearing an expression of panic. “Many things can cause bright red spotting or bleeding. If you are experiencing cramping or clotting, this could signify something serious. Seek medical care as soon as possible.”

“Are you cramping?”

“No. I feel fine…normal.”

“So what should we do?”

“I don’t know. We have a house full of people. And my doctor’s office is closed.”

“We can go to the hospital.”

I thought for a minute. “No. It’s okay. It’s probably nothing.”

“Are you sure?”

“This is Preston’s big day. I’m not gonna ruin it.” I wiped and looked at the toilet paper. Nothing. I held it up for Rich. “See. It’s done. No more blood.”

I freshened up again and tried my best to make myself not look like I had just been crying. I rejoined the party and pretended like nothing had happened. I sat with Preston on my lap as we opened all kinds of fun new toys and clothes and the tricycle that Rich and I had picked out. Camera flashes came from all over the room with wide smiles behind each and every one.

Cake time and I sat Preston on the dining room table with a huge sugary confection glowing in front of him. As our family and friends started an off-pitch rendition of
“Happy Birthday to You,” I felt a small pain jab at my stomach. My eyes rose and met with Rich’s on the other side of the table. He saw my expression and immediately his wide smile went flat.

The pain sharpened, like a shard of glass being jammed into my mid-section. I gripped one of the dining room chairs and fought to stay on my feet. Me crippling over in pain would only cause mass hysteria. And I didn’t want that for my boy’s big day.

Rich made it to my side before the song had ended. “Are you okay?”

“No,” I answered as cheers erupted all around.

I grabbed Marcus’s arm and told him I needed to run to the store.

“Right now?”


Maybe he sensed that something was wrong. I’m sure the looks on both mine and Rich’s faces were a giveaway. All he said was “okay” and turned his attention back to the table and the birthday boy.

By the time Rich and I got into a cab, I could tell that my underwear were soaked through. With blood. Intense cramping continued to hammer at my abdomen, in waves, just like labor.

Forty-five minutes later, we were in the ER exam room waiting for the on-call obstetrician to come in. But my pains had slowed considerably. That had to be a good thing, right?

A stout man with graying hair came in, followed by a woman wheeling a machine. I recognized it immediately—an ultrasound machine.

He didn’t say much, aside from “Hello. I’m Dr. Leiman,” and after sticking his hand up inside me, asked if it hurt when he pressed on my stomach. It didn’t.

The ultrasound tech lubed up the wand and inserted it. She moved it around and fiddled with the machine and I struggled to make out what was on the screen. It was dark and blank and silent. I didn’t hear the whump whump whump of a baby’s heartbeat. But maybe this ultrasound machine didn’t have sound.

The doctor turned to me. “I’m sorry Ms. Marshall. But you’ve lost your baby.”

“No, that can’t be right. The pains have weakened. I feel better now.”

“I think you’re through the worst of it.” He turned to the screen and pointed to a little blob. “See this here?”

I nodded.

“That’s most likely the fetus. But there’s no heartbeat.”

I strained my eyes, praying for something on that grainy screen to move or blink or do something so this nightmare would end.


  1. Great to read something that isn't paranormal for a change (definitely the majority!) but here normal is quite bad even when the blood is real. You had my attention throughout. Liked the sweet interplay between husband and wife..:)

  2. Very sad, but well written. Such a significant death, the most distressing type.


  3. Thanks so much L'Aussie and Donna! I struggled with the scene. Thankfully, I have never experienced this kind of pain myself, so getting it right was very hard....but very important to me.

    Thanks for stopping by!!

  4. OMG you made me cry! That's so sad, it feels so personal.

    Thank you for sharing this with us, and thank you for joining my Blogfest! I hope you had fun.


  5. Thanks Tessa..and I hope this doesn't sound bad, but I am glad you cried! For me, a great book is one that makes me cry in some parts and laugh out loud in others!!

    And yes, I did have fun! Thanks so much for stopping by!!