Friday, September 14, 2012

Men are from Mars....

And I'm starting to think they don't have much parental instincts there.

So, this morning after the gym, I was in the shower and hubby came in to use the toilet, as I'm sure most married couples do. We chatted a few minutes and heard the door knob jiggle.

He yelled to our 4-1/2 year old son. "You can't come in. I'm going to the bathroom." And then said to me, "Don't worry. I locked the door."

I said, "Why? What if he needs something?"

He said, "What can I do? I'm on the sh$&^er?"

And I replied, "So, if he cut his finger off, you'd say 'Sorry. Can't help you. I'm on the sh&^*er.'"

He said, "Oh. Yeah. You're right."

(LOVE hearing that!)

It's no fun to be interrupted while using the bathroom, and 99% of the time it's for stupid things like the kids asking for snacks or wanting a DVD put in. But I always leave that door unlocked. You just never know when they will need me for something really really urgent.

I've been a mother now for 9-1/2 years. My maternal instincts had kicked in immediately. It was second nature to prepare for all the "what ifs" life could throw at us. I am always the one who's prepared when we go anywhere. I'm the one who thinks to grab bug spray, sunscreen, wippees, medications, sunglasses, hats, etc... Often Hubby says to me, "Oh, good thing you thought of that!"

Why don't men have these same instincts? Or is it just my man who doesn't? He once wanted to go out in the garage and weld things while I wasn't home. Wanted to leave our son in the house playing. I said, "Um, I don't think so. You can't even hear him when you're out there welding." The garage is connected to our house and there is a door separating it from the playroom/den where the kids spend most of their time. But still.

So, is this just another one of those things that separates men from women?? Do women just naturally have these instincts? I feel as if I am always on high alert. I can never fully relax until my kids are safely tucked into bed. Hubby doesn't seem to be the same way...not that he doesn't care and is unable to properly care for the kids...his brain just doesn't think the way mine does all the time. And I do think his operates different when I'm not around. Does his brain get lazy when I am around??

As a romance writer and writer who is constantly exploring relationships between men and women, I'm really intrigued.


  1. If he cut his finger off I do not think he would come up to the door and jiggle the handle.

    1. It was just an extreme example. I'm sure he would be screaming too. :) But what if he were choking? Dad locking himself in bathroom with a 4 year old outside choking and no way to let dad know? I shudder just thinking about it. I once saw a teenager almost choke to death in a mall food court....I get chills every time I think about it and probably will the rest of my life. Nothing to fool around with.

  2. That is so true about us women remembering to pack everything. Then having to haul it out to the vehicle. If I did forget something, of course, it's my fault, but he wasn't willing to participate in the packing. I think men do rely on us too much when it comes to the kids if we're around.

    1. Thank you Nicole!!! I'm not saying they're inept, but I do think they get lazy knowing we will do it.

  3. Yes, guys definitely think about things differently (and less often, LOL) than we do. Which is probably why we bear the babies and bond with them most, as well as provide most of the care. Nature figured it out for us. LOL