Do you envision a face when you write??

I do. Usually it is some popular actor...if it's someone I've watched many times...and studied (especially cute hunky guys!!), I know they way they move, the way they smile. I know what their voice sounds like...I can hear my dialogue come from their lips. I envision them in my scenes and it helps me give better descriptions of the action. The story comes alive in my head and it helps me get it onto paper (or rather computer screen!) And if I am not sure about something, I simply have my characters play out a new scene and if I like my mental movie, it gets changed in my manuscript.

So of course.....IF my book were ever to be made into a movie.......I already have the leads picked out :) For A Bitch Named Karma, leading lady is Rebecca Budding. She knows how to play a sassy woman. Her gay best friend, Cameron Mathison- never seen him play a gay man, but I think he would be good at it!! (Google them if you need a visual!) And my MC's love interest.....oh yes....Zac Efron! (Yes, she falls for a young guy and he is dreamily perfect for the part!!!!! And if my book does someday get made into a movie, I would insist that I be present for any and all love scene filmings!!) He has those eyes and that sexy innocent smile!

The end is near!

A few more things to do and I will be submitting my manuscript to my editor to start the official editing process! Woo Hoo!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This last week and a half has been brutal. I've been getting things ready for my trip (2 days and 8-1/2 hours till we leave!!) and scraping out any time I can to finish my edits. It's been tough. I am so exhausted at night that it is useless to try and get any work done...brain is totally fried. I've had to rely on my son's nap time and even then after an hour or so I found myself getting tired.

I am so ready for this vacation. We haven't done much of anything the past year and I can't wait to relax with my family! Sunny Florida here I come!!!!

A week to go

I am in the last phase of my last self edit before submitting to my editor. I WILL have it done within the next week. I leave for Florida on Wednesday the 30th at 7:25 am...my manuscript WILL be in her inbox before that time.

Luckily I am to the easy part...now I'm just reading through, making sure it all makes sense after swapping out so many words over the past two months and rewording so many lines. So far I like what I'm reading...so all the work has been worth it.

But no matter how much work I've done on my own, I do look forward to the future with a completely open mind. I know I could work on this thing for months and months and still my editor would find things that need changing. I'm actually looking forward to having a set of professional eyes on it to help make it the best it can be.

Editing has sucked the life out of me.

I apologize for not posting much lately. I have been sucked into edit world and it has drained me. I have nothing remotely excited to blog about.

Sometimes I like editing...but other times........It's now to the point where I sit here and make up every excuse not to open my manuscript and get to work: "Oh, gotta check Facebook", "Oh, email check # 5 of the day needs to be done"....."Oh, I better pop into 'fill-in-the-blank-with-any-random-website' to see what's going on there." Anything to stall....

I think I read somewhere that if you still like looking at your manuscript then you haven't edited it enough.

I see the light at the end of the tunnel...I do..I'm getting there! Soon it will be finished....I was never given a deadline for this last self edit....but it will be in my editors inbox before I leave for my trip.....12 days to go.

Once I finish what I'm doing now...which is correcting those no no words.....I am going to do at least one read through, start to finish....I'm kinda excited for that. It's been a long while since I read it and it's changed a lot with all the rewording I've done.

Feeling very tired and very unmotivated today

The last two weeks have been a struggle to get into a new routine...back to school and all that. I hoped it would be easy, but it hasn't been. The morning usually goes smoothly..getting my daughter dressed, fed, backpack packed and onto the bus. Then it's clean the house, do things I need to do around here while my son runs around and makes more messes :) Then it's lunch time and after that nap time for my son....and then there is silence....well..sometimes. Hubby works overnight and goes to sleep after our daughter gets on the bus. He usually wakes around 1 or so.....and my silence is then interrupted by the TV.

Aside from the noise...I think I am just so sick of editing that I have lost a lot of my gusto for doing it. I was so excited in the beginning....but here we sit a month a half later..... I am almost done with this last self edit before I send it on to my editor. My goal was to have it to her before I left for my trip (leaving Sept. 30th). It will happen....but I didn't expect to take it down to the wire. Hopefully most fo my gusto will return once I start official edits!

Birthday reflections

My number increased by one yesterday. While I love presents and a day to celebrate me (we had dinner at The Melting Pot...YUM!!!!), I am not real fond of this number thing. I never quite understood the "29 and holding" line....but boy do I ever now!! I'm a little past 29......and I don't consider myself old.....but 32 sounds and looks way worse than 31!!

I'm happy with my life and I have so many wonderful things in it....and I don't really care about my number.....well....that's what I keep repeating....

I think about where I was 10 years ago. I was 22....I was working full time as a floral designer...I was already dreaming up the business I would one day own. I knew kids were in the plans, but that would be a few years away. Being a writer was not something I thought about at that time. Funny how your dreams change and evolve over the years!

Now I'm in such a wonderful place in my life.....I'm so completely happy and wonder how in the world I ended up with so much perfection!!! I have a fantastic husband, two kids...I'm the happiest I've ever been about my career. We could use a bit more money, but hey, who couldn't?? LOL!

So as I look forward to this new year of my life, I can only hope it is as good as this past one was.

How I Met Your Father Part 4

The final chapter....well...actually...just the beginning!

K and I kissed and after that we were inseparable. We spent every moment possible together. He accepted an offer from the football team at the college I was going to and we spent a year away at school together (he didn't go back though...ended up getting his call from the state of NY and started his job as a correctional officer). When I graduated the next spring with my AAS degree, I followed him downstate where he was working at the time, until he had enough senority to transfer back home.

A little over a year after we started dating, just after I went back to college without him, he proposed at the campground where we met...at my parents campsite in front of the fire. We married two years later, bought a house and adopted a dog. We traveled and enjoyed our lives together and then after 4 1/2 years of marriage, welcomed our first baby, a girl, in 2003 and in 2008, a second, a boy.

How I Met Your Father Part 3

Sorry for my long absence...between school starting, the hubby being off for a few days, kid-sitting my 16-year old nephew and enjoying the holiday weekend...internet time has been extremely limited!!

So back to the story....

We last ended with our heroine leaving K to go talk to D and never going back. I won't go into details, cause this is a story about me and K, but D and I spent the rest of the weekend together.

I went home after the weekend and kept thinking about K. D was the guy I had always wanted....but for as much as I thought he cared about me, he just never took our relationship to the next level. After that weekend...I felt that we were over. Like it had been a culmination of all those years and I came to the realization that he wasn't what I wanted and would never give me what I needed. He called me that week and I remember sitting there....talking to him about nothing at all and hoping the call ended soon.

Then Friday came again and it's back to camp. K was there again. Some of our friends needed to go into town to refresh their cigarette supply, so K offered to drive. I tagged along for the ride. After that we hung out at the game room and when K was leaving, he asked me if I wanted a ride back to the campsites. I accepted and he drove us the short distance up a hill to another area of the campground. He pulled in front of his family's camper but we stayed in his car and just talked and listened to music. Again I was getting those "I want to kiss you vibes" from him. I still didn't let him kiss me.

Saturday us kids did what we always did and that was swim, hang out, play pool and ping pong in the rec room. Stuff like that. Once again that night I rode with K back up to the campsites and again we parked in front of his camper and talked and listened to music. But this time when I got those "I want to kiss you" vibes, I looked right into his eyes and let him :)

How I Met Your Father- Part 2

And the story continues....

So K and I are dancing and I'm totally getting the "I want to kiss you" vibe. Song ends, we go our separate ways. Dance ends and our group travels to another area of the campground, where we usually hung out. I'm talking with K and things are going well and then from out of nowhere D appears.

Let's back it up a bit now.......D and I had a very long and elaborate history and I could go on and on about him for days and days...but this is not about our story, it's about me and hubby, so we'll simplify the D story as much as possible. He was the hot guy who was way out of my league who I never ever thought would like me in a million years, but he did. We were never official boyfriend/girlfriend but we were together a lot and there were some special moments.

So anyway, D walks up, I see him and say to K, "I gotta go say "hi" to someone...I'll be right back...." Famous last words...

You got it...I never went back.

To be continued.....

How I Met Your Father- Part 1

I am a huge fan of the sitcom, How I Met Your Mother. Not only is it hilarious, but it fills the void left when Friends went off the air. I can't help it...I'm a sucker for comedy and romance mixed and essentially that's what this show is.

I was inspired by Lady Glamis's post today: http://theinnocentflower.blogspot.com/2009/08/you-asked-some-more.html. One of the questions asked by her readers was how she met her husband and how he proposed. I love love love reading these kind of stories!!! It must be the romantic in me!

So I decided to post my own love story...many of my readers are romance writers, so I thought maybe some of you out there would enjoy reading my story!

I met my hubby in May of 1995. I was a month away from graduating from high school. I had recently broken up with my boyfriend, I was college bound, and had no intentions what so ever of going away to school with a boyfriend at home.

My family camped every summer...no tents or anything, campers..and pretty nice ones complete with airconditioners, stoves, microwaves, tv's and VCR's. We were seasonal which meant we paid a one time fee and kept our camper at the campground for the entire summer- May through October, anyway. We went every weekend during that time. I'd become close friends with a lot of the kids out there as they too came every weekend. One of my friends was a girl who was a couple years younger than me. We all hung out...various ages...it didn't matter. Then one night this older guy came up to camp; we'll call him K. He was the brother of that friend. I'd never seen him before, didn't even know she had an older brother. He was kinda cocky and arrogant and it completely turned me off. We did talk a little bit and found out the college I was going to was trying to recuit him to play football there that fall.

4th of July weekend came that year and it was always the best weekend of the summer. The campground was packed and there were all kinds of activities going on. Us kids all hung out ad made our way to the dance down at the Rec Room. Usually the campground owners hired a DJ for holiday weekends. I danced with all my friends and had a real fun time. K asked me to dance a slow song with him. I agreed. You can always tell when someone wants to kiss you and I was getting those exact vibes from K. I didn't think I really wanted to kiss him. I'd gotten past his cockiness and he was a nice guy...but I don't know...I just didn't think I had feelings for him.

Too be continued....