Help- Giving and Receiving

Everyone needs help. Whether it be with childcare, fixing a car, mending the house, planning a vacation, choosing the right outfit...no one can do everything all by themselves all the time.

I love helping people. I love when I can use my expertise to help someone who is not as skilled in that area. Everyone has their strengths and weaknesses and it's great when we can use our knowledge to help others. And it's great when we can get help in the areas of life we're not so knowledgable in. I think this is what makes a healthy society. Everyone using their talents to make the entire community better, even if the "community" is just your small group of family or friends.

And writers too. I wouldn't be where I am without the help I've received. I love being able to give back, pay it forward, and help those who are not as far along in the journey as I am. I love sharing what I've learned.

I don't think people should feel ashamed to ask for help. Ever.

But I do think there are some people out there who rely on people too much. They don't do things for themselves ever because they know someone else will do it for them. That's just not right. If you're going to accept help, you need to also be willing to help others....pay ti forward. And actually follow through with it.

And sometimes there are things we don't need help on and don't want it. I am a pretty independent person. And while there are many things I do accept help on, sometimes there are just things I can't and won't. Sometimes a person just needs the satisfaction of accomplishing something on their own.

Do you have anything you are good at that you help others with?

What to look for in a critique partner

Every writer needs feedback on their work from other people. It's a necessary part of the process. A writer is far too close to their own work to see its flaws and holes. A writer cannot always see their weaknesses and crutches. And we ALL have them. No one can put out the best product possible without help.

This is why it's so important to network and find other writers and critique partners. Whether you do it on Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, or in your local community. Every writer needs the writing community. Even those who have been published several times.

I know it's not easy to send your baby off to some stranger, and I don't recommend that. It's important to find critique partners that are perfect for you. People you have some kind of relationship with, even if only online. Here are a few of my tips for finding the very best ones.

- Find partners who write what you write. I think it's very necessary to critique with someone who understands your genre and knows what to look for in a proper plot. Genres vary and what works for one may not work for others.

- Find partners who have experience. It's probably a good idea to critique with someone who has the same level as experience as you, or more. Learn everything you can from those who know more. I know lots of writers who love to help those who are just starting out. Even if it's just a chapter or two. It's amazing what little things can be corrected there that can be applied to the entire manuscript. I do it. I love to help when I can and kinda pay it forward. I wouldn't be where I am without the help I received early on.

- Find partners who will be tough. Gushing and unending praise do not help you perfect your craft. A writer NEEDS to know what they are doing wrong. If your chosen critique partners are too shy to tell you the truth, they are doing you an injustice. It's great to hear when people like your stuff...if feels awesome. But if they are holding back in fear of hurting your feelings, you will never learn what you are doing wrong.

- Find a couple non-writers to read your work too. I love having a mix of beta readers. My writer friends are great at pointing out plot inconsistencies, grammar, genre issues, etc.. But my non-writer betas, who read just to read and relax and escape, I love their input too. They are great at pointing out spots that are confusing. They give me a great idea of what the readers like.

Good luck!!