Tweets of the Week!

I just came up with this fun new idea. I think it's fun, anyway!!

I am on Twitter pretty often. (@StephaniHaefner, if ya wanna follow!) And I come across some really funny, awesome, inspiring, entertaining Tweets. I sometimes retweet them, but I thought it might be neat to collect them and do a weekly post here!

So here we go!

@saralapolla: I'd never actually do this, but sometimes I feel like auto-rejecting when I see the line "As if _____ wasn't bad enough..." in queries.

@alannacoca: Long pants, long sleeves, a jacket, and hot tea. Autumn is here. Dammit.

@stephbeck123: Think if I add a nice scarf to my outfit it will distract enough for people not to notice if I wear sweat pants to my meeting tonight?

@lindseysine: Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the things you did. Mark Twain

@angelajames: A submission where the author let us know he wouldn't be doing any edits on the sex scenes. Always good to know. #editreport

@redhotbooks: Life is almost always better after a snack.

How to show an author love!

Writers are a pretty self-conscious bunch. We work for hours day in and day out, sacrificing so much, and never really know if what we're doing is worth it. Is it good or just crap? The only way to know if the stories in our head come out on paper (or e-reader) as vividly as we hope is to get feedback from readers. The best way to thank an author for a story you read and enjoyed is a review, whether it be on Amazon, Goodreads, email, blog post, FB post.

Recently my husband passed my debut novel, the only one in print, on to a coworker. Two days later he came home with this note:

Hi Stephanie,

I loved your book! You are an amazing (with the word "amazing" underlined TWICE!) writer. I read it in a day and a half. Can't wait to read your next one and I loved the title. Continue writing...it's what you should be doing!!

This has to be the best review/letter I've ever received about my work. It really means the world to me!

Men are from Mars....

And I'm starting to think they don't have much parental instincts there.

So, this morning after the gym, I was in the shower and hubby came in to use the toilet, as I'm sure most married couples do. We chatted a few minutes and heard the door knob jiggle.

He yelled to our 4-1/2 year old son. "You can't come in. I'm going to the bathroom." And then said to me, "Don't worry. I locked the door."

I said, "Why? What if he needs something?"

He said, "What can I do? I'm on the sh$&^er?"

And I replied, "So, if he cut his finger off, you'd say 'Sorry. Can't help you. I'm on the sh&^*er.'"

He said, "Oh. Yeah. You're right."

(LOVE hearing that!)

It's no fun to be interrupted while using the bathroom, and 99% of the time it's for stupid things like the kids asking for snacks or wanting a DVD put in. But I always leave that door unlocked. You just never know when they will need me for something really really urgent.

I've been a mother now for 9-1/2 years. My maternal instincts had kicked in immediately. It was second nature to prepare for all the "what ifs" life could throw at us. I am always the one who's prepared when we go anywhere. I'm the one who thinks to grab bug spray, sunscreen, wippees, medications, sunglasses, hats, etc... Often Hubby says to me, "Oh, good thing you thought of that!"

Why don't men have these same instincts? Or is it just my man who doesn't? He once wanted to go out in the garage and weld things while I wasn't home. Wanted to leave our son in the house playing. I said, "Um, I don't think so. You can't even hear him when you're out there welding." The garage is connected to our house and there is a door separating it from the playroom/den where the kids spend most of their time. But still.

So, is this just another one of those things that separates men from women?? Do women just naturally have these instincts? I feel as if I am always on high alert. I can never fully relax until my kids are safely tucked into bed. Hubby doesn't seem to be the same way...not that he doesn't care and is unable to properly care for the kids...his brain just doesn't think the way mine does all the time. And I do think his operates different when I'm not around. Does his brain get lazy when I am around??

As a romance writer and writer who is constantly exploring relationships between men and women, I'm really intrigued.

The Look Challenge!

The other day on Twitter, Laura Lee Nutt tagged me in a Tweet for her challenge post. Sounded like lots of fun!!

The Look Challenge works this way:

Find the first use of "Look" in your WIP (work in progress) and paste the surrounding paragraph into a blog post.

Tag a string of victims-ehem- friends and fellow writers to participate. If you're not tagged, feel free to participate too!

So here goes! I'm not currently working on something right now, just plotting my next book, but here is a the last book I finished, that I am currently trying to find a home for. It's called Try Me On For Size. Enjoy!

She had a file for each of her “interviewees,” as she’d decided to call them, complete with photos of their naked bodies. After all, she wasn’t just looking for an able penis, she needed a spokesperson for this new venture. And the new venture would require them to be mostly naked. 

Reading but no commenting?

I'm told for every 10 blog readers, there is only 1 comment. I'm told people read, but no one comments anymore.

When I started blogging, it was a way for me to meet other writers, commiserate, start the "platform" I was told I needed to start. It was fun and I enjoyed it. Back then I had 100-150 followers and on any random day, I'd get a slew of comments. I felt the love!!

But now things are different. I still post blogs, though less frequently. But even with double the followers I used to have, I'm lucky to get 2-3 comments. I check my stats on Bloggers and it shows a decent amount of blog hits. So I *think* people are reading. But I guess I'm just not seeing the proof...in the form of feedback....interaction....the whole reason I got into blogging to begin with.

But I do get that interaction on Twitter now. So maybe things have just shifted??

I try to keep my blog fresh and updated, since it is doubling as my website for the time being. Blogger is easy to use and with the pages function, it just made sense to me. I can't afford to hire someone to make a fancy website right now.  And I wouldn't know how to update it anyway.

So...blog readers, if you're reading this, why do you read and not comment? I don't comment on every blog I read...usually it's because I just don't have anything to add.

The Big 3-5 :(

Tomorrow is my birthday. Not happy.

Never thought I'd be the woman who was embarrassed to state her age or would want to lie about it. I didn't used to be. I used to think I looked great for my age, so I liked telling people and having them say "Wow, you don't look that old at all!" I try to do lots of fun things and be outgoing...I don't want to act old. But this birthday...it's just not sitting well with me. It just sounds old.

I remember being 21-22 and thinking 30 sounded really old...a lifetime away. Then it came. And I was okay with it. But now 5 years later, not so much. My sister in law told me to shut up...as she turns 40 in October.  So I guess it could be worse.

We're going out to dinner with my parents and brothers. I had a hard time picking a place, since some of my family members are kinda picky when it comes to food. But Mexican works. Plus I can get a margarita to drown my sorrows. Today just me and hubby are celebrating. Kids are both in school in the afternoon, so we're going to a fun little restaurant downtown called The Chocolate Bar. YUM! Today sorrows will be drowned in chocolate cake.

"My way is the best way!"

I'm sure everyone knows someone who acts this way. Their ways are set in stone and they think their way is the ONLY way. It's pretty aggravating to the rest of the world. Especially when they start preaching...without being asked.

I have my own ways of doing things, whether it be cooking, cleaning, parenting, exercising, whatever. I do the things the way I do them because I feel it's best FOR ME. It works FOR ME. But I never try and tell people my way is the only way. I thoroughly believe everyone needs to find their own ways of doing everything and they won't be the same as my ways. And that is 100% okay. If someone asks me for advice, I will tell them what I do and what works for me. But I in no way try and convince them it's the only way. Everyone needs to figure out their lives by trial and error.

Even my kids. Yeah, my daughter is only 9, but even now I try to make her figure things out for herself. Me telling her the answers to everything, or forcing her to do everything my way, only stunts her creativity and individuality. I don't want a clone of a daughter. I want to raise an independent woman. My parents always encouraged me to become my own person and I've loved them for that. I am pretty different from them, and that's okay. I'm still a responsible adult even though I do things differently from them.